“Because now children all over Massachusetts start flipping the literal hell out all screaming, yelling, crawling under furniture. You know The kind of dumb shit kids do and when everyone is like stop being Shitty! They’re like we can’t because witches.”
Have you ever seen Drunk History on Comedy Central? If not, I suggest that you drop everything right now and watch. This is drunk history in book form and it is hilarious. I don’t think that I have ever laughed so hard at the twisted knowledge that is shared between these pages.
What caught my attention was the cover and the title. My husband will forever be known As Cash Money and I’m so sure that he’ll be psyched to know that. Ah! Sarcasm!
And if what I said above wasn’t enough to make you read this, I’m going to tell you some of the chapter titles that might change your mind:
They all laughed at Christopher Columbus Because he was dumb.
Tea is for wankers.
Benjamin Franklin is the god of lightning.
Alexander Hamilton is a straight up G.
And now my personal favorite…..
Billy the kid loves bacon, Killing people.
I will admit that some of these chapters are way out there. If you are one that is hurt by everything and can’t take a joke, then I suggest you grow a pair and read this anyway. It will lighten the mood and make you find the hilariousness that is history.
You also find some chin stroking pondering facts about history. Who knew that people called Ben Franklin Big Dick? That Christoper Columbus could have been a chippendales dancer? And that they wanted you to forget about the tea and drink 40s.
I really enjoyed this book and it makes you wish that this is how they teach everything in school. I know that I would have been more willing to show up and actually pay attention. I’ve learned a lot of interesting things along the way and history will never be the same.
And the moral of the story is that all children are assholes and is that if an apple tree falls in the forest and there’s no one around to hear it who gives a shit!!?